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The Lord laid this on my heart to sit down and think about what I would like to see in the New Year. I despise New Year resolutions, but God is teaching me how to dream. I am not good at journaling, this is where my blogging comes in, this will be a post I am hoping to come back to throughout the year and see how God changed things, how some prayers were answered, and to see how God blew my mind on other things. And, God willing, I would love to come back and post December 2007 what God taught me through everything.
Lordy, I do not expect you to do that, this is just my wish for me. I don’t even know what my plans are for tomorrow, let alone for December 2007 that is why this is called Meditations.
This next year is going to be a big year for me; we are hoping to move houses. Now some people move houses like they change shoes. We do not. This will be a big adventure of fun, faith, and me not freaking out this year. To make it easier for me to refer to later, and to organize my thoughts I am breaking down my meditations into categories: (which looking at them I can see how one category can overlap with another, anyways here we go)
Moving
I don’t know when it started but I am scared to dream. Mainly because I want God’s will no matter what, and it seems whatever I dream He changes. I feel things deeply so when I dream and things change I tend to get my feelings hurt. The Lord has been teaching me how to turn over my dreams and desires to him, but still dream big. He has been saying, “Come on girl, give me all you got, DREAM BIG”. I am by NO MEANS referring to size of house but the size of dreams (these are different).
Moving into a new house is where I am going to be laying all this on the line (my big hopes and dreams and God’s will). (if you are so inclined you can read some background here of why this is a big step for us). I have in mind what I would like, but I have been specifically praying the Lord will lead us only to a house He can bless.
I get scared there might be a difference between the two, so I try not to get my heart involved. I just respond “Do your will, that is what I want”. But the Lord has been working on me saying, “yes, I want you to seek my will, but Laurel, I want you to dream big! Give me your hopes and dreams, tell me your hearts desires, lay them all out.” And during that time, I feel like a little girl holding those dreams to my chest tightly, saying “just give me your will”. Not sure if this makes sense to anyone but me, but I am excited and fearful where God is leading all this. We will see.
Faith
I am stepping down helping the middle school group. I want to get back into a bible study at church; unfortunately I can not do both. This was a very difficult decision for me. I will still help out in big events and chaperoning. But I think I am going to need the extra support this year, and the face to face accountability.
I have several devotionals and books that I will be reading to help me grow spiritually. One is Beth Moore’s Voices of the Faithful, and Living Life On Purpose by Lysa TerKeurst is being sent to me by a sweet friend. I look forward to diving into these books along with any additional bible reading and bible study. I will also be continuing my Daniel Bible Study. I HAVE to stay in the word or Satan really plays with my mind, my fears, and my doubts.
Blogging
I can not begin to tell everyone how much blogging has blessed me. The fact I am writing devotionals for Laced With Grace, is already something that blows my mind to where the Lord is leading me. The women I have met, and how they have helped me grow spiritually, amaze me. This post describes how I feel about my blogging friends.
My desire for this year is to not care who comes across my blog (as far as numbers go) but to care for each person and make each one of you feel special. My passion if you read in my “About” page above is to remind you God loves you. No matter what you have done. I recently told my friend, “I just turn this blogging stuff over to the Lord and I am excited to see where He will take it.” Just like the rest of my life, Christ is the center of my blog, and if I lose focus on that, become prideful, or even think that some of these words are my doing and NOT His then I walk away.
But right now he has blessed me with friends that teach me, friends that encourage me, friends who keep me accountable in my Christian walk, and friends that are just down right funny and help me get through days when nothing seems funny. And maybe, God willing, I will be able to meet some of you face to face this year.
Family
I will officially have a teenager this year. This is hitting me. But I have to say I am enjoying my oldest son more and more. I am able to bounce ideas off his brain, and I love his take on things. I pray the Lord gives me the ability to see “the big picture” instead of the daily hormone roller coaster from day to day (mine and teenage son’s).
I have one son who has difficulty in reading. I pray the Lord will let me know if I need to take things further involving a private tutor or not.
My middle son has difficulty seeing other people besides himself. I pray he learns tenderness towards others. I did see glimpses of it when he was with his baby cousin this Christmas, so I know it is there.
For Hubby I am praying for his job and his health.
Thank you for reading my meditations, I look forward to reading your goals, dreams, and desires for this up coming year. I am excited to see how God is going to blow our minds.
Thank you Lord for the friends that come my way, may they see You in me. Amen
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