Rachelle at Seek First His Kingdom did a post on Blogger friends last week and it really has been rolling around in my head since I have read it. I am still fairly new to blogging, I know I have some “rose colored glasses” on to some of the dangers of the Internet, but I do try to protect myself somewhat. One thing I do is make sure manly man knows what I post, he is my computer “geek” and keeps me accountable.
But anyways I am digressing. Rachelle touches on several topics that could be several posts all on their own, but I am addressing the questions she asks right at the last part of her post:
What do you think? Are the blogs the “real life” of the 21st century? Or, are we all just living in some parallel inauthentic cyber-universe that cannot substitute for the real thing?
There are several differences between face to face friends and blogger friends. Non-verbal is a very powerful form of communication. I am a big believer in non-verbal (I majored in it in college~communications major here). Tone can be and sometimes is misinterpreted via Internet or email. We may be joking, but it could either hurt another or be taken as serious. Lastly, I know about you from your perspective, not from your family’s or your husbands or your children (and the same goes for me). You could tell me you are a good wife, or a good mother…but in reality your definition and my definition could be very different and this is not always communicated on a blog.
But what I have found is that the negatives are few to the great amount of positives. Rachelle goes on to say:
It’s well-known that contemporary western life offers little in the way of real connection with others. Even people whose lives are surrounded with others in their work environment usually don’t do enough actual connecting.
Throughout human history, we’ve sought this fellowship. In cultures the world over, extended families have lived together, or at least very close together, and lived their lives in tandem. As we in Western culture have separated ourselves from each other in single-family homes and alienating jobs, we’ve always had ways of finding that connection we needed: in quilting circles, or coffee klatches, or the Salon, or posh men’s clubs, or countless other settings created to bring people together.
I am at the stage of my life where life is always on the go. My kids can drive right nowyet (praise God). I have one really close friend and tons of acquaintances here in real life. I use to meet weekly for a women’s bible study that we had at our local coffee shop, but that broke up due to one person moving and others going their separate ways. While at church I volunteer with the middle school group. I do believe we don’t do enough actual connecting. And my blog is my outlet for that connecting, mainly to other women. It does not replace my real life friends, but I have found it sure adds to who I consider friends.
Even the girlfriend who I am very close to, we can go weeks without speaking and then pick up right where we left off. With three boys, a husband and working part time, in my case, it is hard to maintain the real close “real life” friendships.
My husband has said he views blogging as my “stress reliever”. And at first I looked at him and said, “What do you mean? I don’t talk bad about anyone, or share any real angers?” And he said, “No you are very respectful, but I am finding that blogging allows you to gain your perspective and gives you an outlet to form your ideas which in return calms you down”. I think he is right. Many of my “biblical message” posts are really God speaking to me through my fingers. Many times I have written a post, and I read it and think, “Wow, Lord thank you I did not realize that was rattling around in my brain.” In return I usually get positive feedback and comments and I want to yell out, hey I am glad that touched you because God was teaching me too, those were His words not mine.
At the beginning of my blogging journey I first met Lindsey who really reached out to someone who just began to blog, barely knew what a blog was and touched my heart in her giving spirit. She helped me design my blog, and went above and beyond for me. I was blown away. I began thinking this blogging stuff was really cool. Then I met Barb and her kind words and support blew me out of the water. I began praying Lord are you bringing these women into my life for a reason?
Slowly the Lord brought Iris, Sissy, Heather, Dee Dee, Judi, Cyndi
……..oh good gracious I could not possible list you all (so please don’t be hurt if you don’t see your name, it already took me an hour just listing these names and linking them, ha!). But you guys have not only been friends, but I found myself praying for you during my devotions. If you were sick or something was happening in your life I found myself thinking of you during the day. When Addison was going through surgery I remember crying in my car pouring my heart out to the Lord that he would heal her. THESE ARE PEOPLE WHO I HAVE YET TO MEET FACE TO FACE, and the Lord has me praying for you, wishing you the best, hurting when you are hurt.
But most importantly you help keep me accountable in my walk with the Lord. I don’t want to ever represent myself other than I am. This is why I allow myself to write my occasional whine post, so you know my world is not perfect, I am not perfect, and I stumble and fall just like the rest of you, I yell at my kids, get impatient with my husband, and sometimes just plain lose my temper. But if you still talk to me after all that……
in my world and by my definition…..I AM HONORED AND HUMBLED TO CALL YOU FRIEND.
All proceeds go to charity! Order your copy today!
