Sometimes the Lord has a way of smacking me up side the head. Many of my long time readers know that that my family tried to sell our house last year. The house was on the market for over a year, but because of the way the market is in our area we have decided to take down the sign. I have been less than happy with the turn of events. I went from angry with God, angry with my husband, not caring, jealous of others, ignoring, apathetic, and back again. Oh what a thorn I have with this. I have cried to my Mom saying whatever I have planned in this last year the Lord closed the door. After so many closed doors my heart has just sunk. I wish I could say I am back on track, but the Lord did speak to me boldly this last weekend.
I was washing my boy’s bed sheets and struggling to get them back on to the bunk beds. Anyone who has owned bunk beds know that changing their sheets equals as much energy as running a small marathon. I was grumbling about the effort and then I over heard my oldest son and manly man talking in the living room. I heard the phrase, “that is why they all think we are rich.” Good thing I did not have a drink because I would have spit it out, shocked by that comment. I asked my oldest son to repeat what he said, and he said “all my friends that came over yesterday think we are really rich.” Yeah right, I mumbled stomping back into the bedroom two of my boys share because we only have two rooms for three boys. Then as I was struggling with the sheets again the Lord spoke to my heart and said YOU ARE RICH what are you complaining about? And the Lord began listing all my blessings in my heart.
Oh I know I am rich compared to the suffering in other countries, which is why I support all the effort Compassion does. But rich compared to the friends my son hangs out with? You see I have spent too much time looking at what others have that seem to be out of my reach, instead of viewing what I do have. God has blessed us by being debt free, we are blessed in being able to take a vacation each summer. There is so much the Lord has given me, but all I could see is what I didn’t have. All I could see were people who made less money have nicer stuff.
Yes our grass looks like a weed haven, each of my boys don’t have their own room, most of the furniture we have was given to us, oh the list could go on (believe me, this pity party has been my home for awhile). But I am ashamed to admit through my complaining, I did not realize how “rich” we were….even among our neighbors.
Thank you Lord for using a bunch of 8th grade boys to snap my perspective back to where it should be. Thank you for not giving up on me and continuing to weed out things in my heart that should not be there.
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UPDATE: Goodness then I wake up this morning to this quote, do you thing the Lord is talking to me, heheh.
“Faith is not in itself a meritorious act; the merit is in the One to Whom it is directed. Faith is a redirecting of our sight, a getting out of the focus of our own vision and getting God into focus. Sin has twisted our vision inward and made it self-regarding. Unbelief has put self where God should be, and is perilously close to the sin of Lucifer who said “I will set my throne above the throne of God.” Faith looks out instead of in, and the whole life falls into line.”
- A.W. Tozer, The Pursuit of God (Camp Hill, PA: Christian Publications, Inc., 1993), 85.
HT: First Importance
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